At Louisville Juice. Tom tells us about a South Carolina legislator “whose legislative record would seem to merit ’round-the-clock adult supervision based solely on things he does on purpose.”
December the First
Bette Midler is 65 and Sarah Silverman is 40.
John Densmore, the drummer of The Doors, is 66.
Dianne, the oldest of the Lennon Sisters, is 71.
And so is Lee Trevino.
Madame Tussaud was born Anna Maria Grosholtz in Strasbourg, France, on the first of December in 1761. She was 16 when she created her first wax figure — Voltaire. In her memoirs she claimed she searched through the bodies during the French Revolution to find prominent citizens, retrieved the guillotined heads and made death masks. Madame Tussaud opened her first museum, in London in 1835.
Allen Stewart Konigsberg
. . . is 75 today. I saw Woody Allen doing stand-up once upon a time when we were both a lot younger (about 45 years ago, sigh).
Here’s a few of his insights, some possibly from that very time.
“A fast word about oral contraception. I asked a girl to go to bed with me, she said ‘no’.”
“I had a terrible education. I attended a school for emotionally disturbed teachers.”
“I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out of my nose.”
“Some guy hit my fender, and I told him ‘be fruitful, and multiply.’ But not in those words.”
“I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy sitting next to me.”
“If it turns out that there is a God, I don’t think that he’s evil. But the worst that you can say about him is that basically he’s an underachiever.”
“More than any other time in history, mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and utter hopelessness. The other, to total extinction. Let us pray we have the wisdom to choose correctly.”
“I don’t want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through not dying.”
Best line of the day, so far
“Right now we have a retirement system that has the great virtue of not being intrusive: Social Security doesn’t demand that you prove you need it, doesn’t ask about your personal life, doesn’t make you feel like a beggar. And now we’re going to replace that with a system in which large numbers of Americans have to plead for special dispensation, on the grounds that they’re too feeble to work for a living. Freedom!”
Best ‘get a grip’ line of yesterday
“Let me just offer some perspective as somebody who’s been at this a long time. Every other government in the world knows the United States government leaks like a sieve, and it has for a long time. And I dragged this up the other day when I was looking at some of these prospective releases. And this is a quote from John Adams: ‘How can a government go on, publishing all of their negotiations with foreign nations, I know not. To me, it appears as dangerous and pernicious as it is novel.’
“Now, I’ve heard the impact of these releases on our foreign policy described as a meltdown, as a game-changer, and so on. I think those descriptions are fairly significantly overwrought. The fact is, governments deal with the United States because it’s in their interest, not because they like us, not because they trust us, and not because they believe we can keep secrets. Many governments — some governments — deal with us because they fear us, some because they respect us, most because they need us. We are still essentially, as has been said before, the indispensable nation.
“So other nations will continue to deal with us. They will continue to work with us. We will continue to share sensitive information with one another.
“Is this embarrassing? Yes. Is it awkward? Yes. Consequences for U.S. foreign policy? I think fairly modest.’’
The last day of November
Samuel Langhorne Clemens (1835), Dick Clark (1929) and Sandra Oh (1970) were all born on November 30th.
And it’s not a national holiday!
Seriously?!
It’s also the birthday
… of Efrem Zimbalist Jr. Inspector Lewis Erskine and Stuart Bailey is 92.
… of Robert Guillaume, 83.
… of G. Gordon Liddy, 80. If the good die young, Liddy will live forever.
… of movie director Ridley Scott. He’s 73. Three nominations for the best director Oscar. Can you name the films?
… of David Mamet. The playwright is 63. Two Oscar nomintations for writing, Wag the Dog and The Verdict.
… of Mandy Patinkin. “Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.”
… of Billy Idol, 55.
… of Bo Jackson, 48.
… of Ben Stiller. He’s 45.
Oliver Winchester was born 200 years ago today. A clothing manufacturer, Winchester bought a small failing division of Smith & Wesson in 1850, the division that made a rudimentary repeating rifle. In 1860, an engineer working for Winchester, Benjamin Tyler Henry, developed the first successful repeating rifle. It was improved upon and became known as the Winchester in 1866.
And Winston Churchill was born on this date in 1874.
Churchillian quotes:
“A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.”
“A fanatic is one who can’t change his mind and won’t change the subject.”
“He has all of the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.”
“Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak; courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen.”
“I am fond of pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals.”
“Ending a sentence with a preposition is something up with which I will not put.”
Best line of the day
“[A]s usual, for authoritarian minds, those who expose secrets are far more hated than those in power who commit heinous acts using secrecy as their principal weapon.
“First we have the group demanding that Julian Assange be murdered without any charges, trial or due process. . . .
“The way in which so many political commentators so routinely and casually call for the eradication of human beings without a shred of due process is nothing short of demented. . . .
“Then, with some exceptions, we have the group which — so very revealingly — is the angriest and most offended about the WikiLeaks disclosures: the American media, Our Watchdogs over the Powerful and Crusaders for Transparency. On CNN last night, Wolf Blitzer was beside himself with rage over the fact that the U.S. Government had failed to keep all these things secret from him . . .”
Best line of the day
“Republicans ritually denounce Big Government and Democrats ritually denounce Big Business (even as both parties take money from Big Banking).”
Stupidest line of the day yesterday
“Inexplicable: I recently won in court to stop my book “America by Heart” from being leaked,but US Govt can’t stop Wikileaks’ treasonous act?”
Uh, excuse me, but Wikileaks is a non-state entity run by an Australian citizen. Treason is betrayal of one’s sovereign or nation.
BTW, no one has been convicted of treason in the United States since 1952. And only 16 in our entire history, including John Brown and the four Lincoln assassination conspirators. Three of the 16 were pardoned — two by Washington and one by Ford — and one verdict was annulled. Brown was convicted of treason against Virginia.
Dude, God has always been a Steelers fan
Buffalo wide receiver Steve Johnson tweeted this after his Bills lost to Pittsburgh yesterday when he dropped a perfectly thrown pass in OT:
“I PRAISE YOU 24/7!!!!!! AND THIS HOW YOU DO ME!!!!! YOU EXPECT ME TO LEARN FROM THIS??? HOW???!!! ILL NEVER FORGET THIS!! EVER!!! THX THO…”
The play:
Had to be God’s doing. There’s simply no other explanation.
The Swamp Fox
Well, duh, line of the day
“So the San Francisco Fed released a working paper in September in which three economists argue that the rich are happier than the less rich, that wealthy nations have higher levels of satisfaction than less wealthy ones, and that as national economies grow, citizens tend to become happier.”
Another paper found that the happiest places have the highest suicide rates. Possible reason: it hurts more to be unhappy in a happy place.
‘Fan’ letter
NFL coaches get paid big bucks, but it may not be worth it when the first-graders are on your case. Yesterday, in the fourth quarter, Philadelphia Eagles coach Andy Reid, trailing the Bears 13-31, opted for a field goal on fourth and goal at the four yard line.
The kick was good, but Aidan isn’t pleased.
You see, Aidan has the Eagles quarterback on his fantasy football team and yesterday’s opponent, his uncle Rob, has the Eagles placekicker. Ultimately Uncle Rob beat Aidan by less than half a point. (And the Bears beat the Eagles 31-26.)
Here’s Aidan’s fan letter to Coach Andy Reid:
Best line of the day (involving food as a metaphor)
“The best thing about the Irish right now is that there are so few of them. By itself, Ireland can’t do all that much damage to Europe’s prospects. The same can be said of Greece and of Portugal, which is widely regarded as the next potential domino.
“But then there’s Spain. The others are tapas; Spain is the main course.”
20 Things I Learned About Browsers and the Web
Google has produced a straightforward and informative look at the internet and browsers in a very, very attractive book-like format — 20 Things I Learned About Browsers and the Web.
What’s a cookie? How do I protect myself on the web? And most importantly: What happens if a truck runs over my laptop?
For things you’ve always wanted to know about the web but were afraid to ask, read on.
You don’t have to understand internal combustion engines to drive a car and you don’t have to understand the internet and browsers to browse the web — but it’s useful knowledge. I recommend you take the few minutes and at least skim the book.
Perhaps especially useful for teachers.
Map of incidence of diabetes
The percentage of adult Americans diagnosed with diabetes has risen steadily for the past 20 years, up to 8 percent of the population in 2008. In some regions of the country, however, the rate is nearly twice that. Since 2004, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention have released estimates for each county, and mapping that data reveals that there are clusters in states like Alabama and Mississippi, where around one in seven adults is diabetic.
Slate Labs: An interactive map. Move the scrollbar to see the changes 2004-2008.
Best line of the day
“When the best that the children of a revolution can do for the defense of their inalienable protection against unwarranted search and seizure is to issue the pathetic moan, ‘Don’t touch my junk,’ a low point of humiliation has been reached.”
Shoe bomber; we take off our shoes. Toiletries bomber; we can’t carry on bottles. Printer toner cartridge bombs; we can’t ship certain quantities of toner. Underwear bomber; we are subject to having our privates viewed or handled.
As Hitchens points out, there has been at least one bomber with the explosives in his rectum. Now what?
Precisely
November 29th
Vin Scully is 83 today. Scully started broadcasting Dodger games in Brooklyn in 1950.
John Mayall is 77. He should be in the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame for his influence alone — Eric Clapton, Jack Bruce, Mick Taylor, Mick Fleetwood, John McVie among those once in the Bluesbreakers.
That’s Mayall in 2004 in the photo and with Clapton for his 70th birthday the year before. Crank it up.
Diane Ladd is 75. Ladd has appeared in more than 100 films and television programs and has been nominated for the best supporting actress Oscar three times including her portrayal of Flo in Alice Doesn’t Live Here Anymore and in a film with her daughter Laura Dern, Rambling Rose.
Garry Shandling is 61.
Joel Coen, the Joel of the Coen Brothers, is 56. (Ethan was 53 in September.) Films by the brothers include O Brother, Where Art Thou?, Raising Arizona, The Hudsucker Proxy, Miller’s Crossing, Blood Simple, The Man Who Wasn’t There, No Country for Old Men, Barton Fink, Fargo, The Big Lebowski, Burn After Reading, and A Serious Man. Wonder what they’ve done with True Grit.
Rahm Emanuel is 51.
Don Cheadle is 46. Cheadle was, of course, nominated for the best actor Oscar for his performance in Hotel Rwanda.
Mariano Rivera is 41 today. He can’t pitch forever, right?
C.S. Lewis was born on this date in 1898. He’s the author of the seven-volume children’s series The Chronicles of Narnia.
Louisa May Alcott was born on this date in 1832.
“Christmas won’t be Christmas without any presents,” grumbled Jo, lying on the rug.
“It’s so dreadful to be poor!” sighed Meg, looking down at her old dress.
“I don’t think it’s fair for some girls to have plenty of pretty things, and other girls nothing at all,” added little Amy, with an injured sniff.
“We’ve got Father and Mother, and each other,” said Beth contentedly from her corner.
The four young faces on which the firelight shone brightened at the cheerful words.
The Library of Congress’s Today in History has a lot about Alcott.
The first Army-Navy football game was 120 years ago today. Navy won 24-0.
Minuteman Missile National Historic Site (South Dakota)
. . . was established on this date in 1999.
The Cold War lives on at Minuteman Missile NHS! Minuteman missiles held the power to destroy civilization. Yet the same destructive force acted as a nuclear deterrent which kept the peace for three decades. At Minuteman Missile it is possible to learn how the threat of nuclear war came to haunt the world.
Launch Control Facility Delta-01
This building functioned as topside support for the underground launch control center. It acted as a multi purpose facility to help personnel perform their mission.
Its primary purpose was to assist the missileers stationed underground in carrying out their mission. Mechanical implements such as a backup generator for auxiliary power and environmental control equipment provided backup support in the event of an emergency. The building contained a security control center where all security activities were coordinated from and personnel would be processed when coming on site.
The structure also included living quarters, a day room, dining area and recreational room that Air Force personnel used during three day duty shifts.
Launch Facility missile silo Delta-09
There is no better place to witness the Minuteman’s role in the Cold War then at Launch Facility Delta-09. From 1963 until 1991 Delta-09 contained a fully operational Minuteman Missile. The Delta-09 silo was one of 150 spread across western South Dakota. In total there were 1,000 Minuteman’s deployed at the height of the Cold War. These nuclear sentinels waited silent and deadly to perform their destructive duty at a moment’s notice.
Above from Minuteman Missile National Historic Site.
Quantitative easing
The Financial Page in this week’s New Yorker explains Quantitative Easing 2 far better than the cartoon video did. It’s not long and it’s well worth reading the whole thing, but here’s an excerpt:
The Fed’s job is to manage the country’s money supply, and it ordinarily does so by manipulating short-term interest rates, lowering rates when it wants to give the economy a push and raising rates when the economy seems to be overheating and needs to be cooled down. At the moment, though, short-term rates are already near zero and can’t be cut further. So instead the Fed is buying longer-term government bonds. The hope is that this will help keep long-term interest rates low, pump more money into the economy, and make investments other than government bonds (where investors have been parking their money) more appealing. The Fed used this tool during the worst of the financial crisis, and it helped arrest the economy’s precipitous decline. Now the Fed is using it once again because, though the economy has recovered, it’s still weak—unemployment is near ten per cent, and vast amounts of productive capacity are idling. In the circumstances, the Fed’s job is to use monetary policy to try to boost demand. And quantitative easing is how you do that when you can’t cut interest rates any more.
The article goes on to explain the backlash from the German and Chinese governments, Republican congressmen, the liberal economist Joseph Stiglitz, and Sarah Palin. Hint: It’s mostly political.
An early look at the movies we should see before Oscar-time
Will “The Social Network” ride its early wave of positive reviews and zeitgeisty momentum, only to fizzle, à la “Up in the Air”? Will “Black Swan” go toe-to-toe with “Inception” in the category of films from directors (Darren Aronofsky and Chris Nolan) who are overdue for accolades? Will the billion-dollar grossing “Toy Story 3,” the final act of a beloved series, which has the considerable backing of Disney and Pixar, pull a “Lord of the Rings” to have a real shot at best picture? And what of “Winter’s Bone” and “The King’s Speech,” indies that are said to be playing well at Academy screenings, and “True Grit,” the Coen Brothers remake which is yet to come?
Amistad National Recreation Area (Texas)
. . . was authorized on this date in 1990.
Amistad NRA is the United States portion of International Amistad Reservoir, formed on the Rio Grande along the border of the US and Mexico. Amistad is known for excellent water-based recreation, camping and is surrounded by a landscape rich in prehistoric rock art, a vibrant border culture, along with a wide variety of plant and animal life.
Sports becomes parody
“In a season full of challenges, Brett Favre has yet another. The 41-year-old Minnesota Vikings quarterback intends to start Sunday even though he’s been sick most the week with what he said Saturday night might be pneumonia.”
BLACK KNIGHT: None shall pass.
ARTHUR: What?
BLACK KNIGHT: None shall pass.
ARTHUR: I have no quarrel with you, good Sir knight, but I must cross this bridge.
BLACK KNIGHT: Then you shall die.
ARTHUR: I command you as King of the Britons to stand aside!
BLACK KNIGHT: I move for no man.
ARTHUR: So be it!
[hah]
[parry thrust]
[ARTHUR chops the BLACK KNIGHT’s left arm off after a short battle]
ARTHUR: Now stand aside, worthy adversary.
BLACK KNIGHT: ‘Tis but a scratch.
ARTHUR: A scratch? Your arm’s off!
BLACK KNIGHT: No, it isn’t.
ARTHUR: Well, what’s that then?
BLACK KNIGHT: I’ve had worse.
ARTHUR: You liar!
BLACK KNIGHT: Come on you pansy!
[hah]
[parry thrust]
[ARTHUR chops the BLACK KNIGHT’s right arm off]
ARTHUR: Victory is mine! [kneeling] We thank thee Lord, that in thy merc-
[Black Knight kicks Arthur in the head while he is praying]
BLACK KNIGHT: Come on then.
ARTHUR: What?
BLACK KNIGHT: Have at you!
ARTHUR: You are indeed brave, Sir knight, but the fight is mine.
BLACK KNIGHT: Oh, had enough, eh?
ARTHUR: Look, you stupid bastard, you’ve got no arms left.
BLACK KNIGHT: Yes I have.
ARTHUR: Look!
BLACK KNIGHT: Just a flesh wound.
[Headbutts Arthur in the chest]
ARTHUR: Look, stop that.
BLACK KNIGHT: Chicken! Chicken!
ARTHUR: Look, I’ll have your leg. Right! [whop]
BLACK KNIGHT: Right, I’ll do you for that!
ARTHUR: You’ll what?
BLACK KNIGHT: Come ‘ere!
ARTHUR: What are you going to do, bleed on me?
BLACK KNIGHT: I’m invincible!
ARTHUR: You’re a loony.
BLACK KNIGHT: The Black Knight always triumphs! Have at you! Come on then.
[whop]
[ARTHUR chops the BLACK KNIGHT’s other leg off]
BLACK KNIGHT: All right; we’ll call it a draw.
ARTHUR: Come, Patsy.
BLACK KNIGHT: Oh, oh, I see, running away, ‘eh? … You yellow bastards! Come back here and take what’s coming to you…. I’ll bite your legs off!
Best line of the day
“Willie Nelson is 77 years old. He’s producing amazing music and touring almost constantly with acts a quarter his age. He raises more money for charity than anyone else in Texas. He has a black belt in taekwondo and plays pretty good golf. He’s on his fourth wife, having pooped-out all the other ones. He’s still making movies, and he won a Grammy last year. He’ll be 78 in three months.
“He is a walking advertisement for marijuana use.”
Juanita Jean’s commenting on Willie’s arrest.
The Border Patrol, keeping our homeland safe from Willie Nelson.