Category: Best Line of the Day

“Romance is the emotional Mt. Everest, littered with the frozen bodies of men who couldn’t take another step. At the top of the mountain are women, wondering what’s taking us so long.”

Functional Ambivalent’s Quick and Dirty Guide to Valentine’s Day

“Do you know that Dick Cheney tortured the guy for a half-hour before he shot him?”

Jay Leno

“Dick Cheney now joins Aaron Burr as one of the two vice presidents to shoot someone while in office.”

Talking Points Memo

“For all the good things it has brought our society, the Web has also fostered ideological hermits, who only talk to folks who believe exactly what they do. This creates an echo chamber that only further convinces people that they are right, and everyone else is not only wrong, but an idiot or worse. So when an incident like this one arises, it’s not enough to point out an error; they must prove that the error had nefarious origins. In some places on the Web, everything happens on a grassy knoll.”

Jim Brady, executive editor of washingtonpost.com.

(Brady’s column is in play around the internets today, but thanks to John Fleck for highlighting this paragraph for me.)

“We can’t think of a president who has gone to the American people more often than George W. Bush has to ask them to forget about things like democracy, judicial process and the balance of powers — and just trust him. We also can’t think of a president who has deserved that trust less.”

First paragraph of an editorial in the Sunday New York Times

“For example, under the law as written there will be no federal tax on the estates of wealthy people who die in 2010. But the estate tax will return in 2011 with a maximum rate of 55 percent, creating some interesting incentives.

“I suggested, back in 2001, that the legislation be renamed the Throw Momma From the Train Act.”

Paul Krugman

“Sometimes when things slow down, the Bagger does his best thinking. Not that he is going to go all Mensa on you….”

Carpetbagger (David Carr)

“But as the G.O.P. tars Hillary as hysterical, it is important to note that women are affected by lunar tides only once a month, while Dick Cheney has rampaging hormones every day.”

— Maureen Dowd

See previously posted entry.

“President Washington, President Lincoln, President Wilson, President Roosevelt have all authorized electronic surveillance on a far broader scale.”

— Attorney General Gonzales at yesterday’s hearing

Washington probably had one of those early Univac computers.

Here’s the clip if you don’t believe it.

“As summed up by the distinguished social scientist who writes humor columns under the name of Dave Barry, residents of Red states are ‘ignorant racist fascist knuckle-dragging NASCAR-obsessed cousin-marrying road-kill-eating tobacco-juice-dribbling gun-fondling religious fanatic rednecks,’ while Blue-state residents are ‘godless unpatriotic pierced-nose Volvo-driving France-loving leftwing Communist latte-sucking tofu-chomping holistic-wacko neurotic vegan weenie perverts.’

James Q. Wilson in an article entitled How Divided Are We?

“A comet is, of course, frozen bodies of ice and dust formed over 4.6 billion years ago—or created 6,000 years ago, depending on whether or not you’re wrong.”

Jon Stewart

“President Bush is urging all nations to cut off aid to Hamas including $234-million dollars we were going to send them. In fact, to make sure the money doesn’t get there, he’s putting FEMA in charge of it.”

Jay Leno

“W. believes in self-determination only if he’s doing the determining.”

Maureen Dowd

“President Bush said that Bill Clinton has become so close to his father, he is like a brother. Which is great because it gives the first President Bush the smart son he never had.”

Jay Leno

“President Bush goes before a disaffected nation tonight to reassert his leadership — quite possibly by insisting repeatedly that he’s a leader with an obligation to lead at a time that requires leadership.”

Dan Froomkin

“The two of them are standing there in the photo, very seriously, attempting to look like a couple of gunmen and succeeding only at looking like the two toughest guys in Human Resources.”

Charles P. Pierce at American Prospect Online referring to James Carville and Paul Begala in a review of their new book, “Take It Back: Our Party, Our Country, Our Future.”

President Bush: “If I had to give you a job description, it would be a decision-maker. I make a lot of decisions.”

Doesn’t he have the oldest written job description in the U.S.: “To Preserve, Protect, and Defend the Constitution of the United States”?

Slightly edited from White House Talk

“Since Arabic names can be hard to spell, I think they should just call al Qaeda’s number two “Kenny”, since he seems to get killed every episode.”

Correspondent at White House Talk