“[Pickett’s Charge] was a magnificent mile-wide spectacle, a picture-book view of war that participants on both sides remembered with awe until their dying moment—which for many came within the next hour.”
James M. McPherson, Battle Cry of Freedom
Category: Best Line of the Day
Clever turns of phrase, special splashes of wit, provocative insight — all in a sentence or two.
Best line of the day, so far
“You can burn the flag as many times as you want and the concept of freedom is not only still there — it’s stronger. I like that about my flag. I would go so far as to say it’s my flag’s best feature.
“I wouldn’t mind if Congress were considering changing some other feature of the flag. For example, if they wanted to represent Rhode Island with half a star, I could get behind that. But I’d hate to chip away at my flag’s freedom feature. That just seems wrong.”
Excerpt from a good piece by Scott Adams
Stupidest line of the day, so far
“If the battle to protect marriage takes even five more years, liberal judges and activists will have destroyed this 5,000-year-old institution, which was designed by the Creator, Himself.”
James Dobson, Focus on the Family Action, for CNN, via Andrew Sullivan
Best World Cup line of the day, so far
“Things not looking good for the Pittsburgh Pirates. They have now lost 11 games in a row. To give you an idea of how bad they are, today they got beat by Ghana.”
Jay Leno (Tuesday)
Rhetorical question of the day, so far
“[D]o we really need every single scientist in the world to agree with every single word of the movie before we see the bigger picture and take action?”
Best line of the day, so far
“Oh, for crying out loud.
“The whole point of America is that you can burn the flag. Nothing sums up her greatness so succinctly.”
Best line of the day, so far
“Heavy rains caused so much flooding in Washington, D.C. they had to close down the National Archives where they keep the Constitution. Luckily, the Bush administration’s not using the Constitution anymore.”
Jay Leno
Best line of the day, so far
“The irony is that when it comes to terror threats, the Administration has decided that a 1% chance is enough to impel decisive action. But when it comes to the global climate change that could wipe out most of the world’s coastal cities and threaten civilization itself, even near certainty is not enough to provoke action.”
Best line of the day, so far
“I’m covering my seventh World Cup, and love the event, but I can understand if Americans who catch a glimpse of soccer are turned off by the weasel code in which players fake grievous, perhaps even mortal, injury.”
George Vescey, The New York Times, who adds:
I’m not a big fan of American football — I get bored between downs — but I admit that the American game does not reward a player for rolling on the turf like a man possessed by evil spirits in a science-fiction flick. That’s downright unmanly, by our standards. Jim Brown used to lope stoically back to the huddle after every play because he never wanted to show pain. “You can’t hurt me,” was his attitude.
Best line of the day, so far
“Like many people, I’d been on the fence about seeing it, mostly because I almost prefer to remain unaware of horrible things beyond my control.”
Alisa Valdes-Rodriguez, who goes on to say, “I was wrong on two counts. ‘An Inconvenient Truth,’ while terrifying, is not depressing. It is a celebration of our planet … I was also wrong to think global warming is beyond my control.”
Best line of the day, so far
“The poor Mavericks — they had home court advantage, they were up two games to none, and still blew it. Even Phil Mickelson said they choked.”
Jay Leno
Best one-line movie review of the day, so far
“‘Nacho Libre,’ naïvely made kids’ stuff, lacks such minor attributes as a decent script and supporting cast.”
Best lines from last Friday, so far
“Father’s Day of course is this Sunday. Or as Monaco’s Prince Albert calls it, ‘The scariest day of the year.'”
“As you may have heard, Prince Albert of Monaco, son of Grace Kelly and Prince Rainier, has admitted to fathering another child out of wedlock. You heard of Prince Albert in a can. How about Prince Albert in a condom. Why don’t we try that?”
“He’s got a bunch of illegitimate kids and he did it the hard way. Without an NBA franchise.”
Jay Leno
Best line of the day, so far
Specialist Mike Moriarty is filming his squad leader, Staff Sgt. Kevin Shangraw, as they bounce along in a Humvee. He asks his leader for his take on the broader mission, and Sergeant Shangraw comes straight off the dome with a government-issue rationale.
“Well, I think it’s a fantastic opportunity for the Iraqis to establish a new history in the country and be able to be a free and democratic society, which in turn should stabilize the whole Middle East and create a freer and more stable earth as we know it.”
“Tell me how you really feel,” an unseen Specialist Moriarty prompts.
Sergeant. Shangraw waits a beat as the bleak landscape flies by in the window before answering.
“Then, after that happens, maybe we can buy everybody in the world a puppy.”
Quoted in column by David Carr
Best line of Sunday, so far
“I am such an idiot.”
Phil Mickelson after some incredibly poor choices led to a double-bogey on the final hole of the U.S. Open (and cost him the championship).
Best line of the day, so far
“Children should get Pfizer stock options for each pill they swallow. That might help the moodiness.”
“Get Your War On” by David Rees (in Rolling Stone), referring to the fact that drug use to “treat” kids increased fivefold 1993-2002.
Best line of the day, so far
“She seems convinced that extremism in the defense of book sales is no vice.”
Alessandra Stanley regarding Ann Coulter in a discussion of Leno and Letterman.
Best line of last night, so far
“It’s graduation time around New York City. We have a lot of honor students here. Yes your honor, no your honor, not guilty your honor.”
David Letterman
Best lines of last night, so far
“President Bush went to Iraq to boost the new government. That shows how rough the situation is in Iraq when a guy with a 30% approval rating stops by to give you a boost.”
“Ann Coulter is going to be on the show tomorrow night. Security is very tight. In fact, there is even restricted airspace over the studio. Her people are afraid that Dorothy’s house could drop on her.”
Jay Leno
Best line of the day, so far
“This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the baby gets hold of a hammer.”
Will Rogers
Alas, the best line of the day, so far
“Our guys played hard, but the American team made a huge strategic blunder by playing against a team that was much, much better.”
Best conversation of the day, so far
Woman: Who do you think would win a fight between Ann Coulter and Maureen Dowd?
Man: A fight?
Woman: Yeah, you know, a death match.
Man: I’m gonna go with Ann Coulter.
Woman: You think? They both wear long, spikey heels. They could put each other’s eyes out pretty fast.
Man: But Ann Coulter would be like, “Rock on, I’m in a death cage!” And Maureen Dowd would be like, “Wait, what am I doing in a death cage?”
–Alt.Coffee, Avenue A
Best line of the day, so far
“Whiskey’s for drinking and water’s for fighting about.”
Mark Twain quoted in Rio Grande Basin: Tapped out, an article on water usage in New Mexico published in today’s Santa Fe New Mexican.
Best line since I got back, so far
“In discussing the incident today Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld said that Zarqawi was mean, vicious and hateful. You know what that means? Ann Coulter could be next.”
Jay Leno last night
Best line of the day, so far
“Because every barrel exhibits its own unique qualities, our tasters must sample each one along the way in order to guarantee that every barrel is pulled from the warehouse at just the right time. It’s challenging work, but there sure isn’t much job turnover.”
Sign at visitors center, Jack Daniel Distillery, Lynchburg, Tennessee.