Category: Best Line of the Day

Clever turns of phrase, special splashes of wit, provocative insight — all in a sentence or two.

Best lines of the hour

Two more good lines from my newest fav web site, Shoebox Blog.

“Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal of the day must’ve had some cold leftover pizza from the night before.” – Mark

“Heidi and Seal have a new baby girl! [October 9th] And, hold on just a sec… yeah, there it is, Heidi’s got her figure back. Great.”

Best seasonal line of the day

“Bernie Madoff masks are hot for this Halloween!  And if you buy 15 of them, and get 15 other people to buy 15, yours ends up being free, or something.”

Shoebox

Runner-up:

“Bob Dylan’s Christmas album is out today, just in time for Halloween. Because, seriously, if there’s anything scarier than Dylan singing ‘Santa Claus is Comin’ to Town’ we can’t imagine it.”

Best insight lines of the day

From a longer piece by Matt Taibbi:

This is what Barack Obama did to “earn” the Nobel Prize. He put the benevolent face back on things. He is a good-looking black law professor with an obvious bent for dialogue and discussion and inclusion. That he hasn’t actually reversed any of Bush’s more notorious policies — hasn’t closed Guantanamo Bay, hasn’t ended secret detentions, hasn’t amped down Iraq or Afghanistan — is another matter. What he has done is remove the stink of unilateralism from those policies.

They’re not crazy-ass, blatantly illegal, lunatic rampages anymore, but carefully-considered, collectively-run peacekeeping actions, prosecuted with meaningful input from our allies.

You see the difference? The Nobel committee sure did!

Best line of the day

“Good morning.  Well, this is not how I expected to wake up this morning.  After I received the news, Malia walked in and said, ‘Daddy, you won the Nobel Peace Prize, and it is Bo’s birthday!’  And then Sasha added, ‘Plus, we have a three-day weekend coming up.’  So it’s good to have kids to keep things in perspective.”

President Obama

This is a pretty good line, too:

“And that’s why this award must be shared with everyone who strives for justice and dignity — for the young woman who marches silently in the streets on behalf of her right to be heard even in the face of beatings and bullets; for the leader imprisoned in her own home because she refuses to abandon her commitment to democracy; for the soldier who sacrificed through tour after tour of duty on behalf of someone half a world away; and for all those men and women across the world who sacrifice their safety and their freedom and sometime their lives for the cause of peace.”

Best 'times are tough' line of the day

“My youngest daughter, who these days is sometimes a kid and sometimes an adult when it comes to menus, got a kid’s menu. You know, with word puzzles, tic-tac-toe layouts, mazes, and figures to color in. It used to come with a pack of 4 crayons — red, blue, yellow and green. Yesterday it had a pack of two — red and blue.”

A reader in Kirkland, Washington, reporting on Red Robin’s cutbacks at NPR’s Planet Money Blog

Nutrition line of the day

“[E]ating ground beef is still a gamble. Neither the system meant to make the meat safe, nor the meat itself, is what consumers have been led to believe.”

From an article in the New York Times: “Woman’s Shattered Life Shows Ground Beef Inspection Flaws”.

The frozen hamburgers that the Smiths ate, which were made by the food giant Cargill, were labeled “American Chef’s Selection Angus Beef Patties.” Yet confidential grinding logs and other Cargill records show that the hamburgers were made from a mix of slaughterhouse trimmings and a mash-like product derived from scraps that were ground together at a plant in Wisconsin. The ingredients came from slaughterhouses in Nebraska, Texas and Uruguay, and from a South Dakota company that processes fatty trimmings and treats them with ammonia to kill bacteria.