“I am friends with Houston City Council Member Jolanda Jones. Jo is former track star, a lawyer, and a bomb thrower. She leaves a trail of pissed off people where ever she goes, and by gawd, I love her for that. When Jo gets up in the morning, the devil cringes and says, “Oh crap, she’s up.” Jo is smart. Jo is afraid of nobody and no thing. She meaner than ten acres of snakes and nobody, I mean nobody, represents the needs of her constituents better than Jo does – all while wearing 5 inch heels and the biggest damn earrings on planet earth. I swear, it takes some serious welding to make her earrings.”
And maybe the single best line ever:
“I was not thrilled with Bill White as a candidate for Texas Governor because the guy is as boring as school play your kid isn’t in.”