Category: People & Human Interest

Divorced From Reality

Speaking of happiness, the same authors mentioned in the previous post had an op-ed piece in Saturday’s Times: Divorced From Reality. It includes this:

The story of ever-increasing divorce is a powerful narrative. It is also wrong. In fact, the divorce rate has been falling continuously over the past quarter-century, and is now at its lowest level since 1970. While marriage rates are also declining, those marriages that do occur are increasingly more stable. For instance, marriages that began in the 1990s were more likely to celebrate a 10th anniversary than those that started in the 1980s, which, in turn, were also more likely to last than marriages that began back in the 1970s.

Why were so many analysts led astray by the recent data?

Click the link above for the explanation.

Why Are Women So Unhappy?

Freakonomics author Steven D. Levitt raised some interesting questions Monday.

In addition, Stevenson and Wolfers released a new study, “The Paradox of Declining Female Happiness,” that is bound to generate a great deal of controversy. By almost any economic or social indicator, the last 35 years have been great for women. Birth control has given them the ability to control reproduction. They are obtaining far more education and making inroads in many professions that were traditionally male-dominated. The gender wage gap has declined substantially. Women are living longer then ever. Studies even suggest that men are starting to take on more housework and child-raising responsibilities.

Given all these changes, the evidence presented by Stevenson and Wolfers is striking: women report being less happy today than they were 35 years ago, especially relative to the corresponding happiness rates for men. This is true of working women and stay-at-home moms, married women and those that are single, the highly educated and the less educated. It is worse for older women; those aged 18-29 don’t seem to be doing too badly. Women with kids have fared worse than women without kids. The only notable exception to the pattern is black women, who are happier today than they were three decades ago.

Follow the link above to read Levitt’s speculation about why.

Follow this link to read about the reaction to the paper or especially here to see how Stevenson and Wolfers themselves respond.

Random Acts of Kindness

NewMexiKen remembers living in the San Francisco Bay area when the tolls on the bridges were 50¢ and it was not uncommon to give the toll taker a buck and tell him you were paying for the car behind you, too.

Now the toll is $3 and most locals use FasTrak. Alas, such is progress.

Anyway the story that follows reminded me of that lost tradition in a random acts of kindness kind of way. I never actually do this kind of thing myself, but I think it’s really nice that others do.

I was in the drive-thru at Tim Hortons by my house and had just ordered a coffee and croissant. I waited to get to the window and they handed me my order and said it had been paid for already. I curiously asked, “Who paid for it?” And the girl said, “The woman ahead of you. She does it all the time for people. And all she asks me to tell you is ‘pay it forward.'”

This made my entire day, and I made sure to tell everyone at work about it!

The next time I was in the same drive through, I paid for the person behind me. The best part about the whole thing was that I could spend the rest of the day imagining how that person felt. I know how good it made me feel, and it stuck with me.

You never know how someones day is going, and a small act like paying for a persons coffee can turn their entire day around.

Help Others.org

Best line of the day, so far

“Do you know the average IQ is only 100? That’s terribly low, isn’t it? One hundred. It’s no wonder the world’s in such a mess.”

— Clive Wearing as reported by his wife Deborah in her memoir, Forever Today.

In a New Yorker article, A Neurologist’s Notebook: The Abyss, Dr. Oliver Sacks tells the fascinating story of Wearing, who after a brain infection in 1985 has been left with no episodic memory whatsoever: “He was left with a memory span of only seconds—the most devastating case of amnesia ever recorded. New events and experiences were effaced almost instantly.”

It’s a fascinating article about something incomprehensibly frightening to imagine. Blink your eyes and your life starts all over again.

It’s also interesting to learn about the various types of memory — semantic, emotional, procedural — that Wearing retains. How amazingly compartmentalized our brains are.

Overheard at the State Fair

As the we noted here a few days ago, as Jeff Foxworthy says: “If you ever start feeling like you have the goofiest, craziest, most dysfunctional family in the world, all you have to do is go to a state fair. Because five minutes at the fair, you’ll be going, ‘you know, we’re alright. We are dang near royalty.’”

Here’s two of the four examples from the Alibi Weblog (click to go read all four).

Father to group of kids outside of the Monkey Man booth: “You will hold hands or I will fuck you up!”

Mother to daughter at the petting zoo: “Janessaaaaaaaaaaaa … you think you know everything, but you’re just a little shit.”

The Stall of America

The newest destination for Twin Cities tourists is the airport restroom made famous by the arrest of Sen. Larry E. Craig (R-Idaho) in a sex sting. “People have been going inside, taking pictures of the stall, taking pictures outside the bathroom door — man, it’s been crazy,” said Gee Butler, who shines shoes at Minneapolis-St. Paul International Airport. Another airport employee said she was asked directions to the “Larry Craig bathroom” four times in the first 15 minutes of her shift Friday.

The Washington Post

High school reunion

NewMexiKen’s high school reunion is next month — they come in 5 year increments when you get to my age. It’s in Tucson and I considered going but have decided against it. I haven’t been to any of the others and I didn’t leave much in high school I’ve ever wanted to re-visit.

But I did think about going and I did think about the whole concept of reunions and how many when they go back so desperately want to impress their high school friends — well actually, they want to impress their high school enemies — in fact, who they really want to impress are those classmates that ignored them altogether. Rent a fancy car, buy an expensive new dress, have “work” done — I’ve heard of people doing all those things to prepare for a reunion.

But it occurred to NewMexiKen that the ultimate coup is to take a hot partner to your reunion to make all those who didn’t know you well, wonder what they might have missed.

So, my question to you is:

Who, alive today, would you want to accompany you to your high school reunion to make everybody wish they’d been your friend? (Better yet, to regret it if they never were your friend.)

I thought of a few myself.

In fact, this all came up when I mentioned I had seen Jody Foster on TV the other day and thought she was impressive and I’d go to my high school reunion if she would go with me. Someone immediately said, “But Jody Foster’s a lesbian.” All the better as a conversation piece I thought.

But really, for the heterogeneous man, I think Angelina Jolie would be the best reunion date. I’m not a particular fan, though I did think she was excellent in A Mighty Heart. It’s just she has a reputation — deserved it seems — as a world-class sexual predator. If you showed up at your reunion with Angelina Jolie, everyone in the place would wonder what you had going for you that was better than Brad Pitt.

(I’d really only want to take a living person with me to my reunion, but it did occur to me that just before she died Princess Diana would have had the desired effect on my classmates. So, Diana might have been a good choice a couple of reunions back.)

Of course, it wouldn’t have to be strictly a “date.” For example:

“My spouse/partner/significant other couldn’t make it tonight, so I’d like you to meet my best buddy Bill Clinton.”

From what I’ve heard, Clinton lights every room he enters and even most of his political enemies enjoy his company and marvel at his personality. But then I thought, taking someone like Bill Clinton to a high school reunion might be dangerous. Clinton would so stand out that at the end of the evening all my old classmates would be saying, “Wow, I never thought Clinton would be there. Who’d he come with again?”

No Clinton would dazzle them and I’d be forgotten. Better yet, the Dalai Lama. The Dalai Lama is known everywhere, is considered by millions to be an actual divinity, and is said to have a presence that causes people to sense his holiness. And, of course, the Dalai Lama’s humility would guarantee that I would get the reflected attention that I desired.

I have one other possibility, but before I conclude I want to encourage you to suggest your choice(s) in a comment:

Who would you like to accompany you to your high school reunion so your classmates would say “I never knew he/she was so cool, I should have eaten lunch with them more often/gone out with them/been their best friend”?

My number one choice would be Osama bin Laden. You show up with bin Laden at your high school reunion and you are immediately marked as a person of vast resources and contacts — and power. He’d be the ultimate conversation piece.

And afterwards, before turning him over to the FBI or Larry King or whomever, I’d take him on a very, very personalized tour of New York City Fire Houses.

Craig Bungling Continues

On “America’s Most Wanted” television show, suspects often get identified after their pictures are aired. Such was the case when Larry Craig’s daughter, Shea Suzanne Howell appeared on ABC.

Craig can add the arrest of his daughter to the list of unintended consequences he is racking up. This sad event proves that “no good deed goes unpunished.”

Boise Guardian

The daughter went on TV to provide a character reference for her father. She had an outstanding contempt of court warrant and was recognized.

McDreamy

Over the years NewMexiKen hasn’t had a lot of dreams — or I guess I should say I didn’t remember my dreams often. That seems to be changing lately, however. Perhaps it’s the profound excitement I get from blogging that’s stimulating them. Who knows?

Last night one dream included Don Imus. Go figure. And it was one of those dreams that had a memory of another dream in it. That always troubles me because I’m not sure whether the flashback dream is part of the current dream or actually was a dream I had before.

Another dream I had last night had to do with the new iPods expected to be announced later this morning (11 MT). Dreaming about Apple announcements really is pathetic.

What is he up to?

The neighborhood phantom returned Sunday night after four nights off. About 9:30 he pulled up, strolled off, then returned after about half-an-hour, waited a couple of minutes and drove off.

As I told the neighbors, I try and be fairly libertarian about what people do as long as they aren’t harming anyone. So, I figure, why call the sheriff?

But this has all the appearances of something at least mildly nefarious.

Love at first sight

I enjoy this story about Julia Thorne, the first Mrs. John Kerry, posted here originally three years ago:

When she was interviewed for the Washingtonian story [1996], Thorne said she didn’t want to get married again. However, she hadn’t totally soured on love.

“I went to a Wyoming ranch every summer and one year a man came out in the ranch truck to meet me. I saw him and I thought: ‘This man looks like a middle-aged hippie alcoholic.’ And he looked at me and thought: ‘She looks like a bitch on wheels.’ And we’ve been together ever since.”

Thorne and her husband, Richard Charlesworth, now live in Montana.

From Washingtonian Online.

Update

The software package arrived Thursday.

No sign of the neighborhood phantom Thursday evening, but we had an evening-long series of thunderstorms that may have dampened his plans.

What a light and thunder show, eh Albuquerqueans?

With all that rain I was thinking of my neighbor. He collects water from the canales (known elsewhere as gutters) and uses it to water his plants. I find that pretty impressive. I mostly use the water from my roof to splash down and wash soil from the yard into the street.

I’ve been seeing a roadrunner (Geococcyx californianus) from time-to-time in the backyard. Beep-beep. No snakes or rodents when they’re around.

That scream you may have heard earlier this morning was when I bent over to adjust the rug under my desk chair and seriously screwed up the disc-nerve arrangement in my spine. And they had been getting along so well. I don’t know if I cried out more from the pain or from the sudden realization that it will be several hours-days-weeks before I can move easily again.

Here’s an item about TV news that I posted a year ago today — Live, local, trivial.

Suspicious Behavior

NewMexiKen is reading Edward Conlon’s Blue Blood, an excellent memoir of life in the NYPD. So, of course, I too want to be on the lookout for suspicious behavior.

And conveniently enough, it has appeared in my neighborhood.

I live at one end of a very quiet street. After 8PM or so, I reckon fewer than a half-dozen cars routinely pass down my street before morning. It’s also an unusually dark street because we purposefully have no street lights and bright porch and yard lights are prohibited. (We like the sky.) Indeed, last night for example, the only real light was the glow from the city and the moon.

The house opposite mine is for rent and has been vacant for more than two months. Sunday and Monday nights after 9PM a dark sedan parked in front of the house (that is, opposite my driveway). A single individual, apparently male, got out, very quietly, and faded from sight. I thought he might be checking the vacant house, but no light came on inside or out. After 15 minutes (I was reading, only vaguely aware of the car and man and not keeping close track), he got back into the car and drove down the street. First night, I gave little thought to it. Second night, I thought that it was at least curious.

Last night, the third night, around 9:45 the car pulled into the driveway of the vacant house — which activated the motion-detector flood lights. I began to watch. When the floods finally went out (after about five minutes), the man got quietly out of the car and disappeared from sight. He was gone about 20-25 minutes, then came back, quietly got in the car and drove off.

I should add that I was reading in my bedroom in the recliner all three evenings (it’s the best chair and the coolest room). I keep the French door to the front courtyard open, so can see the street (dark as it is). I certainly would not have noticed this if I had been at the computer or watching the TV in the living room. (Both of which are in the back of the house.)

So what do you think he’s up to? Suspicious, no? Should I do anything?

This morning I saw my next-door neighbor and told him this story. He usually knows everything that’s going on around here, so I’m certain he’ll be observant if it happens again tonight.

Parallel Play

The essay by Tim Page that NewMexiKen mentioned last week is now available online. I found it fascinating.

In the years since the phrase became a cliché, I have received any number of compliments for my supposed ability to “think outside the box.” Actually, it has been a struggle for me to perceive just what these “boxes” were—why they were there, why other people regarded them as important, where their borderlines might be, how to live safely within and without them. My efforts have been only partly successful: after fifty-two years, I am left with the melancholy sensation that my life has been spent in a perpetual state of parallel play, alongside, but distinctly apart from, the rest of humanity.

‘Topes round up

A guy at the Isotopes games last night had a tattoo (among others) on his upper arm. It was a baby’s footprints — like you get with a newborn at the hospital. Kinda cool.

Oh, and the ‘Topes lost 10-4 to the Round Rock Express when the Express broke open a 4-4 tie with 5 runs in the 8th. There was a small crowd as the new school year began yesterday in Albuquerque. The paid attendance was announced at 6,964, but that included a lot of no shows. We were in the fifth row behind the visitor’s dugout (for $11 each).

Tim Raines Jr. was the Round Rock lead off hitter. His dad was a National League All Star for seven seasons and is still fifth all-time in career stolen bases. Tim Jr. went one for five, but drove in two runs with that one hit, a double.

The red chile won.

Things I would change if I ran the team:

  • Playing the same cut of music for each Isotopes player EVERY time he comes to the plate.
  • Confiscating specialty food from fans entering the park — like diet bars. I realize they need to sell concessions, but come on …
  • Having 9-year-olds sing the national anthem when they haven’t a clue what they are singing (good voice or not).
  • Sending all the ushers to the front of each aisle between innings to watch the crowd. They need brown shirts, not orange to do this.

Hot/Dumb People

I always wonder why people do research to discover the obvious. Now researchers have “discovered” that smart people have less intercourse than people of average intelligence.
…

One reason the dimwitted get so much action is that they tend to be more attractive than smart people. That’s not a coincidence. It’s genetics. Hot/dumb people are more likely to mate with other hot/dumb people and produce hot/dumb kids.

Scott Adams has more.