Supporting cast

Reported by Dwight Perry:

Bill Scheft of Sports Illustrated, on impediments to a Shaquille O’Neal trade: “The Lakers are looking for at least two starters whom Kobe Bryant is comfortable not getting the ball to.”

Anna Quindlen…

was born on this date in 1953. The Writer’s Almanac tells us:

She eventually got a job as a reporter for the New York Times.

Quindlen started writing a weekly column called “Life in the ’30s,” in which she talked about marriage, motherhood, religion, and other personal issues. She wrote about being raised as a Catholic, about the death of her father, and about the birth of her children. The columns were incredibly popular: they were syndicated in more than sixty newspapers, and Quindlen became known as a voice for the baby boom generation. Some people accused her of writing about trivial issues, but Quindlen once said, “Anybody who tries to convince me that foreign policy is more important than child rearing is doomed to failure.”

Satchel Paige…

was born on this date in 1906. A huge star in the Negro Leagues, Paige began pitching in 1926 and was the oldest major league rookie ever when he joined the Cleveland Indians at age 41. Paige pitched in his last major league game in 1965 (at age 59).

Paige first published his Rules for Staying Young in 1953. This version is from his autobiography published in 1962, Maybe I’ll Pitch Forever.

  1. Avoid fried meats which angry up the blood. 
  2. If your stomach disputes you, lie down and pacify it with cool thoughts.
  3. Keep the juices flowing by jangling around gently as you move.
  4. Go very light on the vices, such as carrying on in society — the social ramble ain’t restful.
  5. Avoid running at all times.
  6. And don’t look back — something might be gaining on you.

Which way did they go?

NewMexiKen supposes that three or four incidents don’t make for proof, but I’m beginning to think they didn’t include turn signals as standard equipment on the Porsche Cayenne.

In a related matter, what’s with people who abruptly swerve into the left turn lane and then — once the whole planet can see their intentions — turn on their left turn signal?

Not Your Father’s DNA Testing

From Wired News Furthermore:

DNA analysis is moving way beyond the laboratory these days. At Shish, a hip London diner specializing in grilled kebabs, male customers can take a DNA test to discover whether they might be related to the rampaging Genghis Khan. For $330, the test will determine whether certain markers on a customer’s Y chromosome match the Genghis Khan pattern. “We’ve had Mongolian people who’ve traveled across London to give us their details,” said Shish’s bar manager. And in other DNA developments, Indianapolis scientists solved a timber theft case by matching the stump of a stolen black walnut tree with two logs sold to a lumber mill 60 miles away. Said a Purdue University genetic scientist, “This DNA technology put the log back on the stump.”

What’s a Girl To Do?

Juanita is at her best this week. Take a look.

This is getting to me. Last weekend, somebody on teevee standing behind a pulpit with a seal on the front and CNN cameras recording and disseminating, said that we should go about our Fourth of July activities like nothing was wrong but that we should be on the lookout for suspicious-looking people. This is Texas, for Pete’s Sake, everybody looks a little suspicious on the Fourth of July. That’s kinda like asking you to be on the lookout for tattoos at a biker convention.

Urban myth

Joshua Green also provides some facts about the McDonald’s coffee case:

To persuade the public that frivolous personal injury suits have brought on a crisis, advocates of change religiously invoke cases like the elderly woman who spilled coffee on herself and won a $2.9 million jury verdict against McDonald’s. Such stories tap into a genuine sense of frustration many Americans have with the modern tendency to blame others for problems of their own making. But on closer examination—the kind likely to happen if the GOP declares open war on trial lawyers—such anecdotes will be exposed as the urban myths most of them are. As Roger Williams University torts professor Carl Bogus explains in his book, Why Lawsuits Are Good for America, the woman who spilled her McDonald’s coffee had to undergo a skin graft, spend weeks in the hospital, and offered to settle for $10,000 (McDonald’s refused). She only sued as a last resort—the epitome of conscientious use of the legal system. Her original award of $2.9 million was later reduced by a judge, as most such judgements are, to $480,000, and she wound up settling for even less. To prevent other suits, McDonald’s, which had previously ignored more than 700 similar complaints, stopped serving near-boiling coffee, as did its competitors.

John Edwards, Esq.

An excellent October 2001 article by Joshua Green about trial lawyers and John Edwards in particular from The Washington Monthly. Some excerpts, though the whole article is well-worth reading:

As it happens, Edwards’ professional biography bears a much closer resemblance to the crusading protagonist of a John Grisham novel than to the ambulance-chasers who solicit on late-night cable.

*****

The defining case in Edwards’ legal career wrapped up that same year. In 1993, a five-year-old girl named Valerie Lakey had been playing in a Wake County, N.C., wading pool when she became caught in an uncovered drain so forcefully that the suction pulled out most of her intestines. She survived but for the rest of her life will need to be hooked up to feeding tubes for 12 hours each night. Edwards filed suit on the Lakeys’ behalf against Sta-Rite Industries, the Wisconsin corporation that manufactured the drain. Attorneys describe his handling of the case as a virtuoso example of a trial layer bringing a negligent corporation to heel. Sta-Rite offered the Lakeys $100,000 to settle the case. Edwards passed. Before trial, he discovered that 12 other children had suffered similar injuries from Sta-Rite drains. The company raised its offer to $1.25 million. Two weeks into the trial, they upped the figure to $8.5 million. Edwards declined the offer and asked for their insurance policy limit of $22.5 million. The day before the trial resumed from Christmas break, Sta-Rite countered with $17.5 million. Again, Edwards said no. On January 10, 1997, lawyers from across the state packed the courtroom to hear Edwards’ closing argument, “the most impressive legal performance I have ever seen,” recalls Dayton. Three days later, the jury found Sta-Rite guilty and liable for $25 million in economic damages (by state law, punitive damages could have tripled that amount). The company immediately settled for $25 million, the largest verdict in state history. For their part, Edwards and Kirby earned the Association of Trial Lawyers of America’s national award for public service.

*****

If the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over but expecting a different result, then clearly lawyers like John Edwards drive GOP operatives crazy.

*****

For all the noise Republicans make about trial lawyers interfering with the free market, most people prefer driving on tires that don’t explode, living in homes with insulation that won’t kill them, and raising babies in cribs that won’t strangle them. They aren’t particularly bothered if it takes fear of litigation to bring these things about.

Link via Slactivist via Eschaton.

Stupid, dirty comment

We all put our foot in our mouth from time-to-time — NewMexiKen more than most — but former L.A. mayor and now California Education Secretary Richard Riordan, wins some sort of prize. From the Los Angeles Times:

In a videotaped exchange at the city’s central library Thursday, a girl asked Riordan if he knew that her name meant “Egyptian goddess.”

Riordan, who apparently believed he’d been asked what her name meant, replied, “It means stupid, dirty girl.” Some in the room laughed nervously, and the girl again told Riordan the meaning of her name. “Hey, that’s nifty,” he said.

He has since apologized.

Mountain rules

Colorado Luis knows how to have fun:

We have some friends who live in one of the many mountain subdivisions off of Highway 285 in Jefferson County, and they host a party during 4th of July weekend every year. One of the highlights is the playing of “Mountain Rules Croquet.” It’s croquet, except you’re playing it on a fairly severe slope with rocks, tree roots, and buffalo grass all over the place. They usually come up with some ridiculously difficult course as well. So it ends up being pretty different, and can be damn aggravating sometimes, although because it is also a beer drinking game it is lots of fun.

What about the ‘grandfather’ hypothesis?

From New Scientist:

Senior citizens played an important role in the dramatic spread of human civilisation some 30,000 years ago, a study of the human fossil record has shown.

Anthropologists have long suspected that older people may have played an important role in the development of early human societies by providing extra care for children, helping to accumulate useful information and strengthening kinship bonds.

The so-called “grandmother hypothesis”, based on studies of African hunter-gatherer groups, suggests that infertile women are vital for successful child-rearing despite being unable to produce children themselves.