What is this “Tattoo-to-tooth ratio,” you ask? Simply put, the ratio can be calculated by dividing the number of tattoos present on the patient by the number of teeth remaining in the patients skull. For example, a patient with 24 tattoos and 2 teeth would be said to have the astonishing ratio of 12. A general rule of thumb is that if the tattoo-to-tooth ratio is greater than or equal to one, your patient is indestructible. The higher the TTR score, the lower the likelihood of a terminal outcome. A patient with a TTR of just two could be run over by a truck after being shot twice in the back outside of the bar in which they drank six fifths of whiskey, and shortly after admission to the emergency department they would be demanding cigarettes and sexual favors from any nearby persons.
There’s more. Thanks to SinPantalones for the tweet.