“Mr. [Orlando] Bloom, as is his custom, leaps about, trying to overcome his incurable blandness, and is upstaged by special effects, musical cues, octopus tentacles and pieces of wood.”
A.O. Scott in a a generally positive, more-or-less, kind of, but qualified, review of Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest.
A.O. Scott has got to be a man. I know of no woman who would EVER call Orlando Bloom bland.
I was about to write a comment, but I started thinking about Orlando Bloom and I forgot what I was going to say.