- Turkey has tryptophan in it, which makes you sleepy. So here’s a tip that I learned from Mom to have turkey that doesn’t make you sleepy. The night before Mom marinates the turkey in Red Bull.
- Tomorrow is the big Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade. There is a White House balloon this year — but it won’t stop leaking.
David Letterman
- They say that Abraham Lincoln cemented the idea of a National Day of Thanksgiving during the Civil War. To get people’s minds off all the political strife and division brought about by war. Thank God those days are gone forever.
- Yesterday President Bush officially pardoned the White House turkey. Then after he pardoned the turkey he appointed it the new head of FEMA.
Jay Leno