Paper quips

From Sideline Chatter:

• Steve Schrader of the Detroit Free Press, after Tony Siragusa, Fox Sports’ corpulent sideline reporter, called Lions QB Joey Harrington a “champagne and caviar” kind of guy: “Not that we’ve ever met him, but Tony looks like he might be a beer and pretzels, meat and potatoes, biscuits and gravy, chicken and dumplings, turkey and dressing, surf and turf, pizza and pasta, nachos and wings, chips and dip, macaroni and cheese, cake and ice cream kind of guy.”

• CBS’s David Letterman, with a special announcement for Britney Spears fans: “There will be no wedding on Saturday. It’s a bye week.”