Archive for December 12, 2004

Lord of the Flies

The oldest of the Sweeties, Mack, turns four Monday, so his parents decided to host a birthday party. To their horror, nearly everyone invited accepted — and all who accepted came. That meant that Saturday afternoon 24 three- and four-year-old boys (and one two-year-old girl cousin and one little brother) took over the island that is Mack’s playroom.

Jill, official mother of Mack, reports that the swarm was amazingly well behaved, but that it did require a periodic “Freeze!” so that a census could be taken to make certain no one had escaped to some other part of the house, or worse, outside. (”Christopher? Are you sure you dropped him off? We don’t remember seeing him.”) There were moments, Jill also reported, when the boys seemed to realize that they had the adults grossly outnumbered, but she says they were easily held at bay with the cake knife.

The ice cream and cake was delayed until the last minute so that the children could be released to the custody of their parents before the sugar fully kicked in.

NewMexiKen is sad to live so far from his grandchildren; hence the prominent display of their photos on this blog. Even so, 1900 miles seemed about right while this party was on.

Best line of the day, so far

“But might the people who scammed the country about Iraq also scam you on Social Security?”

The Daily Howler

All the sports news that’s fit to print

The Brushback.com, where sports meets The Onion. Example headlines:

Eli Manning Demands Trade To San Diego Chargers

MLB Owners Agree To Eliminate Steroids From Post-Game Buffet

Proposed $584 Million Ballpark Would Pay For Itself In 500 Years

Link via Off Wing Opinion.

Buying in Bulk

Kevin Doughten in The New York Times:

I had always hoped you’d never have to hear this, but the newspapers have it now, so it’s only a matter of time. I prefer that you get the story from me, so here goes: for the past three Christmas shopping seasons, I have been taking performance-enhancing drugs to give myself a competitive advantage at the mall.

I’d like to apologize first to those my actions hurt the most: my family, my friends, and the management and staff of the stores at the Garden State Plaza Mall in Paramus, N.J. But I also want to apologize to my fellow shoppers. You deserve a level playing field out there in the aisles, but when I can easily rip the last U2 iPod Special Edition from your hands and then toss you aside like used gift wrap - well, no one would call that a fair contest. To those that I have body-checked or pancaked on my way to a display rack of progressive-scan DVD players, I am truly sorry.

It gets even better.