Catty caddies

From the “Morning Briefing” in the Los Angeles Times:

Golfer: “Do you think we can find that one?” Caddie: “Sir, you could wrap that ball with bacon and Lassie couldn’t find it.”

Golfer: “Do you mind not checking your watch so often—you’re really making me nervous.” Caddie: “This isn’t a watch, it’s a compass.”